Well, we passed denyingphoenix’s one year anniversary a week or so back, and seeing as how the lack of air conditioning is stalling my brain waves, let’s see what I’ve learned in the past year:
- The left coast isn’t all that scary, but an 8% sales tax is a sure sign of another earthquake.
- Protein powder and Metamucil do not taste good in diet coke. Water does just fine you idiot.
- Digital cameras do not bounce on concrete. Instead they produce images that induce panic and earn them a few week stay in a resort in upstate New York.
- A person can indeed make themselves enjoy pickles. Peaches are still a lost hope.
- Gatlinburg, TN is heaven & hell mixed together. Get rid of the Las Vegas schtick and we’ll talk again.
- It will never be un-weird to go to an old friend’s wedding, but scotch helps.
- Cell phones are not the tool of the Devil. But the games on them definitely blow.
- Unopened 27-year old whiskey from your parent’s wedding is phenomenal. Opened vodka from the same event tastes like grandma.
- Painting a room will never be fun. Painting a room red is eternal damnation.
- You can, in fact, wear a studded punk belt with dress clothes in a high-level meeting without anyone noticing.
- A person can improve their Scrabble skills by playing every day.
- Life is indeed fragile, and I’m often too absorbed in watching what’s coming around the bend to take stock.
