Aw, little buddy turns 18 today. It seems as if it were just last month that you were about weeeee big. Now you’re all grown up. And smoking. When the hell did you pick up smoking? And that mouth of yours… Do the other sailors know how liberally you curse? Gracious…

Anyway. Happy 18th birthday FTILFF. Now make sure you register for the draft. Oh, and dump that little tramp you’ve been seeing too, ok? She wears too much makeup.

1. Aya Kata’s shirt from Beautiful Decay - What a beautiful shirt. Yea, it’s $30 but the illustration is incredible. Perhaps even a smidge better than the Steve Buschemi shirt?
2. How dare you instant message a supermodel! - Heather has a particularly hilarious post. A cutting insight into the irrational fears of humans women.
3. ReleaseGuide.com - I used to use the Metacritic link. This is much more comprehensive. And I check it every week. I is teh loser. [via chrisglass]
4. Local breweries - We stopped off for a celebratory drink last night after closing, and I enjoyed on a BBC Nut Brown Ale. Sometimes the little guys just do it better.
5. America’s Bread Battle - I caught this last night on Food Network in a rare moment of couch time. The bakers featured in this show did things with bread that left my mouth agape for a solid hour. Silkscreening? Feathers? Who knew a baguette was that hard to make? I should stick to the microwave.

OK, FTILFF, another slice of cake? Oh. You’re going out tonight? Well I hope it’s not with that floozie!