So the reason that I haven’t bothered to write anything prior to this today is not for reasons such as laziness, forgetfulness or even an overall lack of being an interesting person. No, in fact the reason that I’m 10 hours remiss is that I can barely put fingertips to keys today without fear that the two will melt together. It’s that freaking hot. And I’m a generally uninteresting person.

And, because the Big Dude Upstairs likes to punish me for being a homeowner loves me so much, our air conditioner is all done broked again. Seeing as how I am a spoiled Westerner who, 1) no longer lives as college student in make-shift, non-freon blessed slums and 2) who will complain about his lack of relative comfort when most of the other humans on this earth are in actual, legitamite discomfort… I have no idea where I was going with that sentence because I passed out due to heat stroke. Something about being an enfant terrible…

So currently it stands at a sweaty 87 degree farhenfreakingheit in my house and 101F outside. Jonas is doing a sad, furry interpretation of Dali’s Persistence of Memory (melting clocks) on the back deck while I lay on the floor with my head in the freezer*, typing with one finger tip while the other tries to shove as many ice cubes into my face as possible. I would take a picture of the entire scene but I think my camera turned to primordial ooze several hours ago.

*Bottom-loading freezer. Otherwise this would make no sense. Or less sense. Or perhaps just physically impossible. You stopped reading awhile ago. So did I.