It’s no secret that I love the TED talks. I’ve linked to them on more than one occasion on here because I often find them to be substantive and inspiring. Most recently, I watched Jamie Oliver’s talk on teaching children about food. Kids and food. What a recipe for disaster.

Ask any parent what the top five things they dread every day are and I would wager that “dinnertime” is consistently on the list. In our home, the “what are we fixing Liam for dinner?” question is always said with a sigh and heavy with resignation. Why? Because we know it’s going to be a fight.

It didn’t used to be. When he switched from formula and rice cereal to baby food, things were peachy. Being stubborn, I refused to let him eat store-bought food because I wanted him to have fresh ingredients. Every Sunday I would spend between four and seven hours cooking large batches of food to freeze in ice cube trays. Am I to be applauded? Hell no. Yet when people hear that I made my baby fresh food, people look at me like I refuse to shower or something. Somehow cooking food for my kid is bizarre, when pre-made stuff is readily available.

Something happened last summer, though, that changed every evening since: the week that Liam switched daycares to a school that provided breakfast and lunch, his palette went out with the dirty diapers. Gone was my baby boy who would eat leeks & sweet potatoes, or eggplant bolognese or salmon and capers in a béchamel sauce. Here to stay was my toddler who only eats chicken nuggets, pancakes, breaded fish sticks and grilled cheese. Getting him to eat a plain slice of cheese and swallowing it without making the Arsenic Face will forever be listed as one of my greatest achievements. Katie, you can put that on my tombstone.

At first I figured that his taste buds just changed, part of growing older. But then we discovered weird inconsistencies in his likes and dislikes. He devours ravioli at school. But at home won’t touch it. The problem? Homemade marinara sauce on non-Chef-Boyardee pasta. That’s not what they serve at school.. Green beans at daycare? Sure! At home? Did you really expect me to eat this?

Thank God for fruit, that’s all I’m going to say, because that kid is at least 83% bananas and pineapple (the remaining 17%, if you must know, is pure Irish dùr).

While discouraging, disheartening and down right maddening, it’s rather understandable. Liam knows he has choices now. Why would he eat green beans (even if slow cooked with ham hocks and onions) if he could have chicken nuggets? He has choices because someone else is making the nutritional decisions for him on 48% of his weekly food intake. When he knew no different, he was open to trying things. Now he only tries something if they offer it at school first. School/daycare dictates his diet.

Don’t get me wrong, I know kids traditionally hate vegetables, have weird palettes, go through bizarro phases, etc. I get it. I know that I have no choice in it really because he is in daycare and out of my control. But listening to Jamie Oliver’s speech made me realize that even if I don’t win, and he refuses to touch my grilled cheese (made with homemade bread), maybe one day it’ll sink in that food is supposed to be made at home and that making your own food is not only important nutritionally, but crucial to his health. It’s how I grew up, and I really appreciate the fact that my mother didn’t cave to the Processed Food/Drive-Thru Revolution during my childhood.

Goodness knows it would have made her life a lot easier.